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Strong Communication = Sexual Satisfaction

How to ask for what you want in the bedroom

Strong sexual communication can lead to real sexual satisfaction. The idea that sex should always be spontaneous is not set in stone. Great sex is sometimes like a good recipe: you need to know the ingredients in advance, how they combine - and master the technique to create something that really makes a difference!

Yet creating the right environment for a sexual experience may require a lot of verbal communication.

Here are some key tips that'll help you communicate verbally with your partner

  • Don’t feel like talking about it, try writing it down – you can even put it in a sext
  • Choose the right moment – are you both relaxed and in the mood?
  • Be straight-forward and assertive – it’s sexy to say what you mean.
  • Humour is OK as long as is doesn't lead to misunderstandings – sex is supposed to be fun – your proposal can be light-hearted and provocative.
  • Set any rules in advance and feel free to adapt them – sex isn’t a contract…things can change.
  • Discuss your limits and needs.
  • It is OK to change your mind if something doesn’t work
  • Respect your partner's choices and never judge him/her. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom

Want to try something new but don’t know what? Here are some ideas for starting out:

  • Switch power roles. Usually on the submissive side? Try taking control.
  • Sex in interesting locations – try getting it on outside of the bedroom.
  • Perhaps a little BDSM – some light spanking never hurt anybody.
  • Incorporate a sex toy – whether it be a cock-ring, butt-plug, or classic vibe – a toy in the bedroom can add an extra layer of pleasure
  • Invite a guest – adding a partner you both find attractive could be an interested way to boost intimacy

Good luck – and don’t forget to incorporate toys if you need them!